Hard to Answer Questions

There are just so many questions I never know how to answer.

• Where are you from? (Depends why you are asking.)
• How many states have you lived in? (Five? Four, plus DC?)
• How long have you lived in Colorado? (Well, I first moved here ten years ago, but I've since moved out  five times for anywhere between four and twelve months.
• How long have you lived in the US? (Most of my life). How old were you when you moved to the US? (Seven) When did you move out of Russia? (When I was nine). When did you last live in Russia? (When I was ten. Are you confused yet?)
• Where in Colorado are you from? (Denver? Boulder? TR/Bailey? I've called all these places home at one point).
• Where in Denver are you from? (Well, I'm not actually in Denver, I'm from the suburbs...) What suburb are you from? (My address reads Englewood, but a more accurate answer would be Greenwood Village or Centennial, I guess...?)
• What school do you go to? (....CU Boulder, I guess....)
• What year are you? (Senior? Junior? ... Fourth year?)
• What do your parents do, or worse, what does your dad do? (Well, I could answer the question honestly and you'd apologize for asking it, or I could skilfully dodge it so that you don't learn that my father is dead).
• What pronoun do you prefer? (The one that won't make you assume my gender identity... oh wait.)
• How many countries have you been to? (Does Vatican City count as a country? Do I count Wales and England separately, or the UK all together? Do I make a political statement and count Catalunya and Pays Vasco separately from Spain? Is it fair to count Germany if I've only been to Berlin, France if I've only been to Paris, Ireland if I've only been to Dublin, and Mexico if I've only been to the beach-side tourist resorts?)
• What's your name? (Kae? Ksenia? Ksyusha? Cream/Kreme? Depends who is asking, your native language, the context, and which of my friends you already know. I always pause before answering this question...)

Oh, questions....